Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Trouble in River City
I live in Mayberry. Actually, I live in the little town where the television shows "October Road" and "I'll Fly Away" are/were filmed, but my friend Leslie calls it Mayberry.
Every Halloween the downtown merchants hand out candy during the day to trick or treaters. Well, most of the downtown merchants do that. We don't because we are a bunch of scrooges. In any case, downtown is crawling with little cows, penquins and skunks (it seems the black and white trend has carried over to Halloween costumes this year).
We have to deal with a lot of mentally unstable people in our office, and a gentleman left our office in a huff earlier promising to be back with his "protest signs" pursuant to his first amendment rights. We've been waiting for his return, but so far nothing has materialized.
Or so we thought. I just went to the bank next door and one of the tellers mentioned some crazy man being out there. Ends up he showed up with a sign proclaiming that our office only handed out tricks and she told him to leave.
I'm kind of disappointed that the trouble in river city was so easily resolved.
Every Halloween the downtown merchants hand out candy during the day to trick or treaters. Well, most of the downtown merchants do that. We don't because we are a bunch of scrooges. In any case, downtown is crawling with little cows, penquins and skunks (it seems the black and white trend has carried over to Halloween costumes this year).
We have to deal with a lot of mentally unstable people in our office, and a gentleman left our office in a huff earlier promising to be back with his "protest signs" pursuant to his first amendment rights. We've been waiting for his return, but so far nothing has materialized.
Or so we thought. I just went to the bank next door and one of the tellers mentioned some crazy man being out there. Ends up he showed up with a sign proclaiming that our office only handed out tricks and she told him to leave.
I'm kind of disappointed that the trouble in river city was so easily resolved.
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Friday, October 05, 2007
Scene: Publix in suburban Atlanta; 1:00pm on a Friday afternoon
Young(ish), professional(ish) looking woman (YPLW) orders her sandwich over in the deli area and heads over to check out after grabbing some sea salt and black pepper kettle chips because she read about them on some blog.
Three lines are open: (1) Express lane, (2) Aisle 6 and (3) Aisle 1. YPLW chooses the express lane after scoping out the competition and finding lots of people doing their weekly shopping. She remembers those days of having such a luxury and tries not to be jealous. Kinda like she tries not to be jealous of all the women she sees walking while she's driving to work every morning.
Taking her place in line behind the middle-aged African American woman, YPLW notices that the woman is singing aloud. To John Mayer. "I wanna run through the halls of my high school. . ." etc. Not only that, she's dancing--including adding a sassy little flip of the head every time the music reaches a certain point.
In front of the woman is the wannabe cowboy with faux cowboy boots, jeans with a permanent crease on the back leg complete with a Cloroxed stripe, a case of corona, a case of Sam Adams Boston Lager, a bag of potatoes, two packs of Camels and two packages of pork chops. He keeps looking at the woman like she's possessed, but she just keeps singing. And bopping.
Young(ish), professional(ish) looking woman (YPLW) orders her sandwich over in the deli area and heads over to check out after grabbing some sea salt and black pepper kettle chips because she read about them on some blog.
Three lines are open: (1) Express lane, (2) Aisle 6 and (3) Aisle 1. YPLW chooses the express lane after scoping out the competition and finding lots of people doing their weekly shopping. She remembers those days of having such a luxury and tries not to be jealous. Kinda like she tries not to be jealous of all the women she sees walking while she's driving to work every morning.
Taking her place in line behind the middle-aged African American woman, YPLW notices that the woman is singing aloud. To John Mayer. "I wanna run through the halls of my high school. . ." etc. Not only that, she's dancing--including adding a sassy little flip of the head every time the music reaches a certain point.
In front of the woman is the wannabe cowboy with faux cowboy boots, jeans with a permanent crease on the back leg complete with a Cloroxed stripe, a case of corona, a case of Sam Adams Boston Lager, a bag of potatoes, two packs of Camels and two packages of pork chops. He keeps looking at the woman like she's possessed, but she just keeps singing. And bopping.
Wednesday, October 03, 2007
Love Etta
My sister had always called Etta "Ettatalia" or "Ettasmellia." She called me last night to tell me that while he was running through his "God Blesses," my nephew said, "God bless Ettazalia."
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