Sadly, it's the most action I've seen in a while

"You know I had to walk 30 blocks to GET to the gym last night."

"I know. I KNOW I should walk to work. I know this."

But I don't. I live maybe half a mile from my office, but I still drive to work every day. L has moved to New York after nearly a decade in D.C. and has laughed at me since her first visit to Mayberry for not walking to work.

My battery was dead yesterday, so after hitching a ride to the office, I walked home to meet the guy that AAA sent to jump me off. Naturally, I texted L on the way home to let her know I was walking--even if it was only because I had a dead battery.

The wrecker service called when I was about a block and a half from home and said that driver was waiting for me. As I walked down my driveway, I saw a 60ish, white haired man waiting at the bottom. I'm 33 and no super model, but it would probably be clear to most people that we were not a match made in heaven.

Not so clear to ole Jimmy.

"I hate to see a beautiful woman like you walking."

Why? I thought. Instead I replied, "It's not a problem. I work downtown, so it wasn't far." I popped the hood for him and he starts looking for the battery.

What kind of work do you do?

I'm an attorney, but don't hold it against me.

Well, if I'm not being too forward, are you single?

Yes, I'm single.

I don't know where the battrey (sic) is in this thing. I swear. Some of these newfangled cars. . .Do you like country music?

Yes, I like some country music. My sister lives in Nashville so I'm kind of forced to like it. (Why I didn't just stick with a one word answer, I'll never know.)

Ever heard of the Bellamy brothers?

Yes.

Have you heard that song "If I said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?" That's what you reminded me of just now.

Now, I have decent hair. Sometimes, my eyes are OK. My fingernails have always been a big bonus. But my body? People, NEVER have I been accused of having a beautiful body and rightfully so.

Well, what do you like to do for fun?

I stall while thinking, what in the world do I tell him?

Travel.

Well, what do you like to do for fun around here?

Travel.

OK, I'll shut up.

And he still hasn't found the blasted battery. He asks to look in the trunk (I drive an SUV) so I opened the back for him. I tell him I'm pretty sure that the only thing back there is the spare tire and he asks for the owner's manual. I give it to him and then go inside to get my dog to let her out.

I have an 80 pound Weimaraner, and she was worth her weight in gold when she came down those steps barking to beat the band. She went right for him, but I managed to hold her back. He was sitting on the back of the car reading the manual, so we went into the back yard. She then refused to come back--I guess she wasn't feeling Jimmy's vibe either.

As he continues to search for the battery ("This ain't one of them hybrids is it?") he asks if I like racing. NO. I take Etta back inside and call my dad to fill him in while I'm in there.

Finally, upon my return, he thinks he has located the battery and proceeds to hook up his little tester. He thinks. He tells me to try to crank it to see if it will turn over at all. Blessedly, it cranks right up.

Old Jimmy goes in for the kill at this point. He tells me that he enjoys going to the dirt track races and singing karaoke at the VFW and if I should ever find myself wanting to go out and do something, I should call him.

He's pulling out his card and checking my AAA card at this point.

Have you ever heard of Alan Jackson?

Yes.

He's my cousin. Doug Stone, too. But I've got the most famous name of all.

He turns his card around to reveal his name handwritten on the back: Jimmy Hendrix.

As I pull out of the driveway to head to the auto parts store down the street, I leave L a message:

Let me just tell you what happens when you call AAA to jump you off in Mayberry. They send out a white haired Jimmy Hendrix who enjoys dirt track racing and singing karaoke at the VFW and who is so busy asking you out that he can't find the blasted battery in your car!